probably super late sunday/early monday week 7

[crazily]

[ Weirdly, Break actually isn't in his room or getting punched by Undyne. In fact, he doesn't return to his room until very late at night/early the next morning. He has a handkerchief in his hand that's stained with blood, but he tosses it on one of the beds without much thought. Break paces around the room briefly, and it seems like he's anxious about something, but finally, he laughs. His gaze turns up, and he feels stupid doing this, but he takes a seat on his bed and folds his hand in his lap. He's not quite looking at anything, and his breath is heavy and wet because of the death shocks, but he still speaks to... seemingly no one. ]

...If you're listening, then let me just say first that you're a bastard, Gilbert.

[ He's talking about the letters here, as will become clear as he continues. Break shifts uncomfortably where he's sitting on his bed, since this is a bit awkward, but he just continues talking softly. ]

But... I'll do my best. There was a while where I hesitated, but it's like I said to you before. I have to remember my priorities. Even if— Even if it doesn't end up working in the end, I have to try and survive. I still have no intention of dying here. I'll take your stupid letter to heart.

[ There's another pause, but this one is longer before he stands up. ]

I just wanted you to know that. Even if you're dead, I know you'd be worrying like an idiot.

Comments

[stupidly]

[Silence is the only thing that answers Break back at first.

But then, something hits the side of his face. If he picks it up and feels it, he'll note that it's the handkerchief he just discarded, wadded up.]

[crazily]

[ Break is so startled by the handkerchief hitting him that he actually flinches very sharply. It's almost enough for him to fall off the bed, actually, because he's really on edge more often than not without meaning to be. He's always listening and feeling things out for the sake of replacing his sight, so the handkerchief smacking him in the face startles him more than a little. It comes without any sign of someone to throw it, and it immediately has Break reaching for his cane.

But... No one is here.

His fingers linger in the air as he reaches for the cane, and his lips part lightly. He strains to hear, because surely it's much more likely that someone managed to sneak in without him noticing. It's completely idiotic of them to do so, he thinks, she he definitely would have cut them down in his surprise. And yet, he hears nothing. Break pauses and with a slow motion he touches the handkerchief at his side as if to confirm its presence.

He's not sure where to look, and his eye darts around like he's struggling to find something to focus on. There's a sliver of hope in his expression, but it's dull, tired. He clenches the handkerchief into his hand, the shifts to sit up straighter on the bed again. There's a longer pause this time as he hesitates, but he unballs his fist and holds the handkerchief out to empty air as if he's offering it to someone. ]

...If you're here, take it.

[ Break's voice is surprisingly sharp and distant in those words. It's definitely clear that he's doubtful of this situation. He doesn't want to allow himself a false hope. ]

[stupidly]

[This time, there isn't any pause. The handkerchief is lifted out of Break's hand, and he'll feel fingers brushing against his palm as it goes.

Though the handkerchief is dropped back down to the bed soon after, since Gilbert wants to conserve what energy he has.]

MMMMmmmmm 1/2

[crazily]

[ Break looks at his hand, but then quickly looks up to where he would imagine Gilbert would be standing based on the brush of those ghostly fingers. It immediately has his throat feel like it's closing up, and it has nothing to do with the death shocks. He stares, wide-eyed at nothing, but after a moment, his eye grows glassy as a tear forms. For Xerxes Break, this is the sort of weakness that he never shows. Even when Break was faced with terrible things, he never shed a tear over them. Whether he had lost the ability to or simply pushed it away, it as simply something he didn't do.

Yet the expression on his face is overwhelming relief. He's shocked, but so relieved, and he takes a breath to speak that's shaky and tenuous. It sounds weak and frail, even to his own ears. ]

[crazily]

[ But it's also quickly interrupted by a fit of coughing. Having that kind of raw, physical emotion overwhelm him is enough to make that congestion and difficult breathing spike. He pats at the bed for the handkerchief again, but he doesn't quite grab it before an especially wet cough sends blood onto the comforter. ]

Damn—

[ He spits out the curse (a little literally, since it comes with a splat of blood of its own), but then seems to abandon the handkerchief entirely as the coughing fit dies down. Break stands as soon as he's able, and he moves frantically to the dresser. Even with that one tear that's dripped down his face, it seems like he's ignoring it for now in favor of something else.

Break digs until he finds his (useless) notebook, then tears a page out of it. That piece of paper is torn in half, and each piece folded in half. It's an odd, frantic sort of process, and he's definitely struggling to do it so quickly, but he also isn't stopped by coughing. The two torn sheets of paper are set at opposite ends of the dresser with the folded flaps of paper pointing up. Break is leaning heavily against the dresser, but he's just staring at the wall in front of him intensely. ]

The paper on my left is "yes" and the paper on my right is "no." Flick them for the answer. You can handle some questions, can't you?

[stupidly]

[Just in case Break had any doubts that it's Gilbert in his room right now, he'll feel a little flutter of fabric on his shoulder once he's done manically setting up the paper. It's the handkerchief again, which Gilbert has bothered to pick up and bring over because goddammit Break take care of yourself?? He'll expend some energy for that, because 1) Break really does need to look after himself and Gilbert's genuinely worried, and 2) he's hoping that it'll serve as a larger reminder.

He shouldn't push himself just because he's not around to make sure Break doesn't exceed his limits anymore.

That said, after another pause, there's a flicking sound coming from the yes paper.

Though he'd like to do more than answer yes or no questions, he can't. He can't even be heard, though he supposes being able to touch things is a small blessing considering what the dead who came before him have had to deal with...

(Guilt gnaws at him regardless, since he shouldn't have put Break into this situation in the first place, he should have been more cautious, faster, on his guard--

Maybe if he had been any of that, he wouldn't have to see Break wearing such a painful expression.)]

[crazily]

[ The handkerchief once again gets him to pause, but this time it comes with a smile, however pained it might be. Break hesitates, but he grabs it, and he at least obediently uses it to mop up the blood around his mouth. Before he gets to his questions, he at least allows some softer words. They'd gotten caught up in the cough and somewhat lost in them, since in that moment of emotion, Break perhaps would have been more genuine. But now that he's regained his focus, it's filtered in the way that only Break really manages to turn something nice into something insulting. Even so, his voice is at least soft, if incredibly sad and tired for him. ]

Don't waste your energy on that, idiot.

[ But once he's done at least cleaning up the blood, he takes a deeper breath to steady himself. If someone were to walk in, it would probably be a bit odd, since Break is definitely just standing at his dresser with his eye closed, but luckily no one is up at this ungodly hour or reckless enough to try and come visit Break... ]

First of all, I want you to know that Sadie killed you, in case you didn't know. If she's there with you, please stab her in the foot for me, since the woman from my dream appeared and didn't let me.

[ FUCK YOU SADIE HE'LL GRUDGEWANK EVEN IF YOU'RE DEAD ]

Do you have any idea where you are?

1/2

[stupidly]

[DAMMIT SADIE HE FUCKIN KNEW IT]

[stupidly]

[But his own quiet seething and Break's grudgewank aside (though he'll make a mental note to go punch Sadie later), he'll refocus on the task at hand. The softness in Break's voice is heartbreaking in a different way, and it's hard-- well, impossible really, for him to ignore it. He wants to reassure him, or to tell him to be wary of that woman in his dream, or to pass on his presence to the others, but he can only flick the yes paper once more.

It's a pretty aggressive flick, so presumably that's a very yes.]

[crazily]

[ That answer is actually surprising, and it gets Break to pause as he chooses his question carefully. He knows from the mentions at the slumber party that he only has a limited time, so he's trying to be selective with what he asks. ]

Is it this town in some fashion? A warped one, I assume but still, are you "here" in a sense?

[stupidly]

[There's a quick one-two sounding set of flicks on the yes paper.]

[crazily]

[ Break nods, and there's yet another long pause before the next question. Gilbert will be able to see how his face shifts to a familiar expression, though it might be a slightly worrying one. It's determination, but it's also edged with the sort of desperation that's worrying to see on Break's face. ]

Can I save you?

[ And everyone else, he guesses. But listen, no one here is going to be surprised if he has a bias. ]

[stupidly]

[Slightly worrying, yeah he's definitely worried when he sees that. Break will feel a small flick against his forehead...

But then there's silence for a good five or ten seconds, so clearly Gilbert's having some trouble with this one. He'd been tempted to just grab a paper and shake it around, but eventually, Break will feel something in his palm instead: the shape of a ? is traced out.]

[crazily]

[ Because Break has no frame of reference for where Gilbert is, the flick against his forehead gets him to flinch sharply, and he brings his hand up to his forhead with an indignant noise. There's another familiar expression, but at least this one is less worrying. It's definitely the sort of indignant embarrassment that he had on his face when Gilbert had (accidentally) punched him, but Gilbert has the advantage here this time. He can't get smacked with a cane, after all. ]

It's a fair question!

[ UGHHHH SHUT UP AND LET HIM SIN? ]

[ But considering the pause, he feels that's roughly answer enough, though the question mark he feels traced against his hand at least confirms it. It's not a "yes" like he had been hoping, but it's not a "no" either. That's good, and at least a start, however small. Though Break's next question might seem a little more random to Gilbert if he hadn't seen the execution or heard about it. ]

The woman I told you about from my dream when Vegeta was executed— Should I trust her?

[stupidly]

[That definitely earns him a little laugh, not that he can hear it or anything. But Gilbert also makes a mental note to not do that if he can help it, since the last thing Break needs is a series of small heart attacks when dealing with ghosts...

HE'S APPRECIATIVE OF THE QUESTION, THOUGH - or at least the sentiment behind it. Break will feel a light touch against his temple, and then the no paper is flicked. He hadn't seen or heard about the execution beyond what Break had very, very briefly mentioned about being stopped, so it's not as aggressive a no as it would have been if he knew more details.]

[crazily]

[ That's good to know, at least. Even with the touch against his temple (stop being so sentimental and wasting your energy, Gilbert!), he relaxes a little and sighs with a nod. He seems relieved about something based on his expression. ]

...That's what I thought. I have a feeling she likes— No, approves of me, though.

[ Yes, what a surprise, Sin Mom being proud of one of her Sin Children sinning... ]

What about Miata? Is she telling the truth with all of this?

[stupidly]

[FUCK YOU BREAK YOU CAN'T TELL HIM WHAT TO DO!!!!

There's a curious pause in response to that, though. Ugh why does Sin Mom like her Sin Child so much STOP THAT SIN MOM, you stop leading Break down bad paths!! He doesn't like the fact that Break's earned her approval but he doesn't waste his energy trying to communicate that distress.

The pause stretches onward which is probably an answer as it had been before, but then there's another ? against his palm.]

[crazily]

[ That's more or less what he expected, since a straightforward answer would be laughably easy, and therefore not fitting with either of their luck. Break nods, and a neutral sound accompanies it. Those were more or less the questions he was hoping to answer on his own, so now he's going to try and play twenty questions instead of guessing at things randomly. ]

You'll have to forgive me for making this complicated, but being unable to see limits me. So is there something you want to tell me? Nothing sentimental. [ He has to clarify... ] I mean about this place.

[stupidly]

[He really did have to clarify, because "take care of yourself" is 100% the thing Gilbert would have used his energy on otherwise and then he'd just be stuck cursing in Break's room lying on the floor trying to gather up his strength again LIKE A FOOL.

But fortunately one of them isn't a sentimental moron, so there's that. There's a tap on the yes paper.]

[crazily]

[ Break knows you, Gilbert... Don't waste your Danny Phantom powers on something that Break isn't going to do anyways. ]

All right, then narrow it down for me. If it's something about a person, tap the one on the left once. If it's about this place, tap the one on the left twice. If it's something about the nature of the murders, tap the one on the right once. If it's something else, tap the one on the right twice.

[ If nothing else, Break can at least be efficient with playing twenty questions... ]

[stupidly]

[Honestly this is the reason Break isn't the "stupidly" one. What the heck, that's more efficient than Gilbert can be even with his words...

There are actually quite a few things he wants to tell Break too, but he's starting to feel the Ghost Burn now, so he'll carefully think that over and pick one. Eventually, he taps on the left one twice.]

[crazily]

This place...

[ He repeats that part aloud, and he has to consider his own question carefully, since that one is a bit more difficult to ask about. He thinks about what Gilbert would want to relay to him above anything else (since he does expect that there's more than one thing). ]

Tap the left one once if it's something for the sake of escaping. Twice if it's about the very nature of the town. If it's something else, tap the right.

[stupidly]

[There's another pause, and then there are two taps on the left.]

[crazily]

[ He nods, but at least his next question is a bit more certain, since he does have a guess about that, at least. ]

Is it related to the sins?

[stupidly]

[Hmm... Another pause. The yes paper is flicked first, but then the no paper is flicked too.]

[crazily]

[ Ugh wtf Gilbert, follow directions!! Break does look mildly annoyed, but it comes with a laugh. ]

What kind of answer is that? You only get to pick one.

[ But he at least gets the gist that the answer is "sort of." He exhales a heavy sigh as he thinks through it, but then nods. It's difficult for hm to think around with his own experiences, but maybe that's a starting point. ]

Is it similar at all to something from our home?

[stupidly]

[HE'S TRYING HIS BEST HERE DAMMIT. They really do need a third option to say "NO IDEA" since that turns out to be the one Gilbert needs the most.

There's some hesitation, but then the yes paper is hit.]

[crazily]

[ There's another nod, but this one comes with a smile. He had been wondering, but some confirmation was still nice. His directions are definitely getting a little more clipped, since Break definitely needs to Go The Fuck To Sleep to get rid of these death shocks, but as always, he's being stubborn. ]

Once on the left for Sablier, twice on the left for the Abyss, one on the right for Chains, twice on the right for something else. If it's more than one, just pause between each.

[stupidly]

[Both of these grandpas are struggling but neither of them are giving up yet, ugh.

That said, enjoy, because there will be one hit on the left, two hits on the left, one hit on the right and two hits on the right with the proper pauses between each.

He really wishes he could be more helpful. Really.]

[crazily]

Damn...

[ Break clicks his tongue in frustration, since he can't really be that surprised, considering they're all related in their world too, but he was hoping for a little better than this. He taps his fingers against the dresser almost anxiously as he thinks through it, but he nods. ]

Then the same signals. Which one would you say is most important for me to dig at?

[stupidly]

[DON'T LEAVE THESE DECISIONS UP TO HIM...

But after a pause he'll once left for Sablier and twice left for the Abyss, since he can't pick.

But since he's getting really dang tired by now, he pauses to lay one paper flat, since that seems as good a way to say I'M DONE as any.]

[crazily]

[ Break's brow furrows briefly, but he nods slowly all the same. He starts to ask another question, but he hears how the paper is... laid flat, he thinks? He reaches out to touch it to confirm, but he can at least guess at the meaning there. ]

Then it gives me a place to start.

[ That's all he needed, really. Or so he thinks. He grabs the notebook again to tear out another piece of paper, which he folds up four times to make a more heft piece of paper. He sets that at the back of the dresser behind the television. ]

If you need to speak with me, move this piece of paper to the front and center of the dresser. It might take me a while to notice, but I'll check it regularly. Will that work?

[stupidly]

[A flick to the yes paper, which is the only one left up by now.

If he really needs Break immediately, he can always just throw another handkerchief at his face or something anyway. THIS IS FINE...

That said, though there are definitely a lot of things he has left to say - and things he wants to ask, like where were you until now - he's pretty much reached his limit. So after a few more seconds of silence stretch out, Break will be able to feel a touch against his shoulder first, and then a hand resting against the top of his head. Break isn't Oz or Alice, but he figures he could use a good headpat now regardless. It's the most he can do to communicate everything he can't say: that he's sorry, that he'll be here if he's needed, that he'll do his best from where he is, that he'll still hope beyond his damndest that Break will survive.]

[crazily]

[ The flick of the "yes" gets Break to sigh heavily, and it's easy to see the exhaustion in how his body moves. He bows his head deeply so it's more like he's hanging his head, and it seems like he might slump against his dresser at any moment. But he doesn't, thankfully. He pulls himself up, since he actually will sleep tonight for once, but the touch on his shoulder gets him to stop. He thinks that there's something else that Gilbert wants to say to him, and just with how Break thinks, he's still assuming that it's something more direct and informational. He listens for something else, since he's expecting to have his attention drawn somewhere else.

The touch against his head instead gets his eye to widen briefly, but the expression of surprise soon softens into understanding. He almost wants to criticize Gilbert for continuing to waste his time and energy on things like this, but he decides that he's too tired to do so. Though perhaps part of him is just denying that there's a comfort in that gesture. Break actually doesn't move away immediately, and he mulls over his thoughts before speaking. What he actually says is also rather surprisingly gentle and sincere, both of which are qualities that Break very, very rarely shows to others minus perhaps Sharon and her family. ]

You didn't deserve to die at all, much less like that. If I had— [ He pauses and seems to change his mind about what he wants to say, then just bows his head lightly. ] I'm sorry, Gilbert. I couldn't protect you either.

[ But after that, Break walks over to whichever bed is closer and flops down on it quite unceremoniously. It almost looks like he passed out for a second like that, but luckily Gilbert won't have to have a heart attack over that. Break has one more parting thing to say. ]

...But so long as things are like this, then just continue to be my left eye. You can see and hear things that I can't, so just report back to me when you can. I'll talk to Rhys and see about figuring out something that's quicker than the paper.

[ Break closes his eye, then sighs in a way that comes with him visibly relaxing. It seems like he's not even going to change into night clothes, but that's probably not that new... Break probably just takes random naps when he's too exhausted to continue without one. He grabs a pillow and pulls it closer, since it seems like he's not even going to crawl up the bed, but the last part is muffled into a pillow: ]

If there's a way to save you, I'll find it.

[ But after that, Break will actually be fairly quick to go to sleep. It's not any longer than usual, though. Just five hours or so and Break will wake up with a start in a cold sweat, but whatever he was dreaming of will remain a mystery. ]