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week 5 - thursday night slumber party
[ So here they are, the three shady stooges... Break has been dutifully working on a Hyperion Yellow (tm) scarf for Rhys, but he's actually almost done by this point. And so he's also getting a bit bored. Maybe they just need something to break up the night, because knowing these three idiots, they've probably been like sitting quietly in different corners trying to not acknowledge that they're having a slumber party. ]
Ehh... It's not even that late yet, is it~? Thursdays are really the worst.
[ Because, like, murder, but also because they're so long? Like Break doesn't sleep much anyways, but sleeping on Thursdays nights is even harder. He'll ask Gilbert to write down his knitting numbers for him, but then moves to sit crosslegged on the bed like he's not a middle-aged man... ]
I need to take a break from knitting, so~. What should we do~?
Ehh... It's not even that late yet, is it~? Thursdays are really the worst.
[ Because, like, murder, but also because they're so long? Like Break doesn't sleep much anyways, but sleeping on Thursdays nights is even harder. He'll ask Gilbert to write down his knitting numbers for him, but then moves to sit crosslegged on the bed like he's not a middle-aged man... ]
I need to take a break from knitting, so~. What should we do~?
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He'll glance up and over at that, though, brow furrowing briefly. That's a good question, Break! He has no idea!! No wonder the ghosts decided to infiltrate the other slumber party.]
Er... I could see what I brought back from the store.
[Since he pretty much just grabbed an armful of bullshit and left...]
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this is... much more boring than he thought it'd be.
he lifts his head up when break decides to interrupt the silence and lifts an eyebrow at gilbert's comment. this is enough to get him to sit up, pulling his legs to his chest and wrapping his arms loosely around them.
he's also wiggling his toes in his socks because socks. look at the little blue stars... ]
Did you bring any candy? Like, that Break hasn't eaten yet.
[ these are three grown men. ]
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[ But at least even the two boring Victorians are tempted to get less boring on occasions. Weirdly, it's the old one, but. This is why Break's face puckers up in an exaggerated way. ]
Nonsense! If there's any candy, I absolutely lay claims to all of it. My diabetes will act up without it, you know.
[ this is 100% a lie ]
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And I brought enough candy for everyone. Don't just eat all of it yourself!
[When he says "everyone" he means "Rhys and Break", though, since he doesn't have a sweet tooth. But he does have a pack of (insert some weird late 1900s candy here what time period are we even in), which he'll throw in Rhys' direction. Here, star socks. Live your dreams.]
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[ But based on his stupid expression and tone, that's clearly not the case. But by the time Gilbert throws Rhys the candy, Break is likely to make them both question how blind he is, since he snatches it right out of the air like it's no problem. He won't snatch the second attempt, at least.
I just had to tag with this before Rhys got his candy, so just go ahead. ]
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BUT LIKE SERIOUSLY, BREAK. the most horrified look as the candy goes to break and rhys' hand just hangs there, miserably outstretched and empty. why are you so mean to him, break? ]
I'm not... I'm not sure that's how diabetes works. Do you even have diabetes when you come from? Is that, like, even a thing?
[ ... ]
-- Also, hey! Give that back!
[ he might start crying if you don't, btw. ]
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[WHAT A SHOCKING TWIST. Unlike Break snatching the candy out of the air, because Gilbert had anticipated that. He'd already started pulling a second bag out by the time Break caught the first... This is how tired he is. This is what he deals with.
Anyway, tossing the second over. Don't cry, big baby, god!! No one's even died yet!]
Here. There are more if you're still hungry.
[He almost offers to go make tea before realizing that totally defeats the purpose of murdernight sleepover...]
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Well! Either way, it's only fair that the elderly get their share first, right~?
[ Is it. Is it really. Break apparently thinks so, since as he grabs his comforter to make himself into a burrito, he just immediately jumps into why they're Team Shady... ]
Ahh, by the way~ I did get a chance to test out Undyne's skill a bit. She's not bad, but she's slow. ♥ [ break has no chill, like, ever. welcome to knowing this, rhys... ]
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That's insensitive to people who actually have diabetes. Just, like, so you know.
[ rhys, shut up. but he just takes the second box of candy from gilbert and opens it up, popping a few pieces of sweets in his mouth. some sort of chocolate caramel concoction?? let's go with that. it's a box of milk duds. ]
Wait, you fought Undyne? That sounds like a dumb thing to do. Because you're blind.
[ thank you, captain obvious!! rhys is not the most helpful participant in this conversation. ]
Also, is it me or does she constantly smell like fish?
I DIDNT GET THE NOTIF FOR THIS AGH
[Look, he's been trying to convince Break that he doesn't have diabetes for like 1000 years and it always turns out the same way: with Break refusing to budge, probably because it's hilarious.
Anyway, he doesn't say anything about Break's daredeviling abilities here even though he looks minutely exasperated... Instead:]
Well, she is a fish. ...I think?
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I do well enough without sight. My problem is endurance, not anything else.
[ If that sounds somewhat ominous, it's because it is... He's definitely talking about still being perfectly able to kill people, thank you very much. ]
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through a mouth full of milk duds: ]
Okay. [ then to gilbert: ] So, old blind guy versus walking fish. Who do you put your money on, Gilbert?
[ just ignores break completely, apparently. ]
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Er... [He may seem like he's hesitating because he's trying to figure out which one might come out on top, but no. He's just hesitating because he's not sure just how much skill Rhys knows Break has when it comes to mcstabbins...]
...Well, if it's endurance, I think Undyne could outlast anyone here.
[ANYTHING ELSE THOUGH, he'd honestly give it to Break. He's seen what a dang cheater he is in battle many times over the years.]
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Anything else, though, and I would win. Agility is my advantage, so I would disable her before she ever had a chance to strike. ♥
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How would you disable her? She's a fish literally out of water. I don't... I mean, she has spears, I guess? Oh my god, she's like Aquaman. Does she have the powers of the ocean? Oh my god.
[ there's that whirr again as he pulls up her profile on his eye, of course. ]
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If she had powers like that, it would be on the profile, wouldn't it?
[He's looking over in Rhys's direction at the sound of the eyeball whirring...]
But if it's agility, Break still has the edge, I think.
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Two things. One, her reach is predictable. Her spears are [ insert a measurement of Undyne's spear here that's weirdly accurate for a blind guy ] long, so anything shorter than that and she'll have difficulty defending. The distance of the spear and the versatility of the two ends is the advantage that it has. Eliminating both is the goal.
[ He raises another finger ]
Second, she's honorable. As nice as such a thing is in theory, in a fight to the death, it's a weakness. If she doesn't perceive it as a death match, then her guard will be down. That's all that's necessary. Regardless of what she is, she has a head. I would say that cutting it off is a guarantee for success.
[ stop break ]