crazily | week 2 - after the execution

[Gilbert has brought tea like the good bean he is! Because even after a harrowing two days of dancing on the edge(ish) of death (until bias saved his ass by a landslide), he's... well. He has to keep moving, right? For Oz.

He won't mention the letters he already has written; a failsafe in case his bad luck caught up with him today.

But luckily he's distracted from all of that by Break being Break?!]

—If you're that tired, take a nap!!

I will, I will... Don't fuss over me. I'm not the one that just escaped death.

[ He beckons Gilbert closer, and he at least sits up more reasonably on the bed so that he can actually drink something. He holds his hands out expectantly, and in this case it's less being rude and more being honest about his own blindness. If Gilbert directs it to his hands, it's easier for him. ]

You know, I have to admit, there was a period of time where I thought you had gotten ahead of yourself.

[Just the mention of his narrow escape seems to weigh him down a little, and he steps forward with some heaviness to set the tray down. One cup is handed over toward Break, and then Gilbert pushes a thing of sugar cubes his way, too. He hasn't brought any cream or milk.]

...That's why you asked, right? In the way that you did.

[Because you KNEW HE WOULD CRACK--]

I was serious about taking advantage of that accomplice immunity. I want at least one of us to be able to get back, so - even when I was nervous this week- [PARANOID AND INSANE, HE MEANS] -I kept that in mind.

[ All things considered, Break probably won't be having cream or milk anytime soon anyways. He takes one sugarcube, then two, and just starts working on a foul combination of sugar and tea. ]

Mm, that's right. [ And one for him! He pops a sugarcube into his mouth. ] It wouldn't mean a thing to anyone else here, but I know you well enough to know that you couldn't lie in the face of that. My doubts were only because of your nervousness.

[ A teaspoon comes next, though he holds it stupidly as he stirs his tea for sure... ]

I believe you, though. I didn't think that you would do something that foolhardy without a good reason, and I certainly wouldn't have held it against you. Actually, I wold have almost been proud, though that's probably a terrible thing to say. [ it like 100% is ] ...But I'm glad that's not the case. I'd prefer to not have to explain an awkward situation to Oz, you know~.

[ "I'm glad that you're alive." ]

I don't think most people would take that as a compliment, Break.

["I'M PROUD YOU KILLED SOMEONE WITHOUT ME, YOU'RE GROWING UP, NO MORE TRAINING WHEELS." Break, no... But he'll sit in silence as Break massacres his tea, thinking about what he's said. He was affected pretty heavily by the paranoia, that much is true... But he'd clung to their promise as a way to keep grounded, even if it was difficult.

Somehow, he managed to outlast the 1000+ year old sword... Good lord.]

...I'm glad that things worked out the way they did, too. Urashima shouldn't have to deal with that sort of thing, but - I... wouldn't have been able to forgive myself if I had died for nothing.

I know.

[ Which part he's speaking towards there isn't clear, but it might as well be both. He finishes stirring his tea, then takes a drink of it. It seems to relax him, since he sighs heavily, and some of the tension ebbs away out of his posture. There's a pause for a moment which he fills with tapping the spoon against the saucer, but he speaks again shortly enough. ]

...Which, by the way. Since I already went and said it, which is terribly unfortunate, I might as well be clear. It's incredibly tragic, since I would have preferred to just keep something so terrible a secret~!

[ He's being overdramatic to lighten the mood and be irritating, since this is something that's harder for him to admit. That shows in how his expression twists up uncomfortably, but he nods as if to push his words out. ]

I did mean what I said. At the very least.

[He isn't really lightening the mood despite his efforts, but that's okay, because it wouldn't be a day in the life of Break and Gilbert without him at least trying.

Still, when he ends it on that (mildly uncomfortable) note, Gilbert smiles one of his sad little smiles, which is probably the first time he's smiled at all in two days.]

...Thank you. [He knows that Break meant it, honestly. He would have trusted in that even before Break said anything, but still. It's kind, and he understands the gesture of confirmation here.]

And thanks— you worked really hard.

[Oh, so he did notice...]

[ Now Break is getting cooties from this level of sap, so he has to immediately retreat and forget how to be a functional human being. He drinks his tea, then raises a hand as if to dismiss the thought, though his expression is more honest for once. It's clearly not completely dismissive so much as Break is just really, really bad at expressing anything remotely positive, so now he's uncomfortable. ]

Well, I had to, didn't I~? If the blind man had to be the one to piece together how the door trap worked, then no one else would have managed. ♥

[ just in case you thought he was a decent person for like .5 seconds, here he is to immediately be an ass ]

[A SIGH... He understands that Break is both a) genuinely an ass but also b) hilariously uncomfortable with Being A Person, so he knows to let things drop here. Even if he's grateful!

He mentioned as much in his letter, but he's glad he got the chance to say something face to face instead.

...Though, speaking of that--]

I know I don't need to say anything, but you should be even more cautious now. There are people who wouldn't want someone intelligent like that around.

[ Break is quietly glad that Gilbert knows him well enough to not push the issue, and so he's rewarded with an actually serious Break. Mostly. He's not quite balancing the teacup on his head or eating plates yet, but since that's just part of conversations with Break, that might change. ]

Mm, I imagine not. It's why I would have preferred to continue laying low, but I think if I hadn't, you would have taken that sword's place.

[ It's very subtle, but there's a hint of tension in his words that implies how bad that would have been not necessarily just because a killer got away, but because Break wouldn't have taken that well. He hums lowly, then continues. ]

...Well, anyone that tried would probably be in for a surprise. It wasn't exactly my intention, but I ended up proving my frailty when I tried to be nice. [ ew ] Rhys is heavier than he l— [ He starts to use the phrase automatically, but then corrects himself. ] ...Sounds, I suppose.

[At least he's pretty much always ready for when Break starts eating plates. Why is this even something that he has to be ready for, god, he's so tired all the time.]

Mm... It would have been much closer. [Honestly, he puts an equal amount of credit toward Break sleuthing things out but also toward that touching display of friendship that apparently swayed some. And for all his concerns, the vote hadn't even been close in the end...

Why does Break sound like he's more allergic to the word "nice" than to his proven frailty though BREAK, WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS. That said, Gilbert had been pretty distracted with not dying at the time, so the entire ordeal had just passed by as a little blip on his radar. But now that Break's mentioning it - did he see blood, back then?]

...I think it's because of his arm. [...] But it wasn't entirely because of him, was it?

[His tone has dropped low again, quiet and serious. He'd like to be proven wrong.]

[ Break nods, but that nod is more to the idea that Rhys's stupid metal arm weighs far more than he had been expecting. As simple as that gesture seemed, it was a bit too much exertion when he wasn't prepared for it. It gets his smile to turn a bit wider and more clownish, but since it's not accompanied with ruining someone's life, it's easy enough to guess that it's a mask for whatever Break is really feeling here, as it always is.

For a few moments, he just sips his tea in silence. ]

Mmm, no, it's not. It's not quite related to the matter of you losing your memories, but I seems fair enough that this would be included.

[ He shifts, uncomfortable, but in a different way. Even if Break was fatalistic at times, confronting his own mortality was still something that was just as alarming (and frustrating) for him as it would be for anyone else. Perhaps moreso, since he had already done so once before and come out a very different man. This time, there wouldn't be any coming back.

Even if he was proud (if nothing else, those cards were certainly correct in that respect), he doesn't want to confront this truth directly. Ahh, the thought of that makes him feel especially old. ]

I'm fairly certain that I don't have much longer. Even without being able to summon Mad Hatter, the damage is already done. [ He pauses again. ] If we're only killing two or three people a week, and we need to get down to seven... It could be a problem.

[Gilbert had expected bad news.

Gilbert had not expected that they would be cutting it that close with time.

There's some part of it that doesn't even register - not really, because Break has been a constant in his life for even longer than Oz has been, and while he's always chasing after Oz's back, he knows that he can turn around and count on Break to be at his side. The thought of him just suddenly not being there one day is almost impossible to wrap his mind around. They're similar in that way, maybe; fatalistic at times, but still struggling to grasp what the actual reality of death entails.

Being surrounded by it really makes no difference when it comes down to understanding it, in the end.]

What— do we do, then?

[The rules say they can only kill up to two people a week, but he can't imagine anyone would even take that much of a risk. Sisuca had been an outlier...]

If we're going to get down to seven and we go at two a week, it'll take us at least- [A beat as he breaks down the numbers. 24 more need to die, and if they don't get lucky again—] Three months...

[ Break nods as Gilbert breaks it down, because they were numbers he had poured over this last week especially. As his paranoia had increased, those sorts of numbers had become all the more pressing to him. He may not know anything more than soon, but it didn't matter, in a way. The fact that he felt it could fall before this game's natural conclusion was a bad enough prospect. Even though he knew that he had been incredibly lucky to live even this long, to be given a second chance on death's doorstep, it still didn't feel like enough.

Even though his contracts had kept his appearance youthful, in that moment, those little signs of Break's age and just how worn down he's might seem all the more prominent. The dark bags under his eyes because he can never sleep a full night, that lanky, too thin build of his, and just how pale and fragile he really does look. It's easy to forget since Break always dismisses concerns with a laugh or by being nothing short of a terror, but he's a dying man. ]

We work on making sure you can go home. If it ends up being me, then that's a waste, practically speaking. Even if I do get immunity, there's no guarantee that I'd see this to the end regardless.

[ It's probably the sort of practical answer that would be expected from Break, but that doesn't really help soften the fatalism in it. He does try to do so with what follows, though. ]

Not that I have any intention of dying here, mind you. I'll do everything I can to avoid it, in fact!

[It probably isn't surprising that Gilbert doesn't look placated by that attempt at lightening things up. Break doesn't have any intention of dying here - that much is certainly the truth, as far as truths go. But whether or not he'll be able to do anything about seeing that through to the end is another matter entirely, out of both of their hands.

His hands tighten into fists at his sides, and he's quiet for a few more moments, mulling this over and wishing that a magic out would appear.]

...I'll make sure that you come back with me.

[He can't accept any other alternative, really.]

So we'll work toward immunity first, and worry about the rest after.

You're still a troublesome brat even after this long, you know.

[ But his words still sound fond over actually scathing, that said. Even if Break is difficult to deal with, and it's even more difficult to get him to acknowledge people that are important to him... He's gotten better in the last year. He would have never expected that Oz's return would have such an effect, or maybe it's more that his reappearance set a series of events into motion.

Either way, despite himself, he's remembering Shelly's words. He can never remember them with a full sense of nostalgia, but at the very least, he's understanding them more. Break realizes the irony in the fact that it's taken him this long, but he only hopes that Shelly wouldn't hold that against him too terribly. ]

That's all we can do, I think. So~! I'll certainly continue doing my best. We just have to make sure to keep catching culprits, since if someone takes up our spots, I'll be fairly cross! [ he'll straight up murder them, immunity be damned ]

[Break won't be able to see it, but he probably doesn't have to to know that there's a soft sort of surprise on Gilbert's face when he hears that. Still a troublesome brat, huh... Well, he supposes that isn't wrong. He was a troublesome brat as a kid, and hadn't it just been recently that Break had scolded him for the exact same thing? For not moving forward, for being unable to climb the hurdles of his flaws...

He hopes he's doing better with it, now. It's a nebulous feeling that he can't really put into words, and it's not the same at all as it is with Oscar, but-- when things boil down to it, he still wants to make Break proud.

That said.]

That won't happen.

[Because Break would straight up murder them yes, but mostly he's just trying to be shonen here. Kind of. They're still talking about mass murder...]

But... how long do you think we should wait now? I'd rather not have a repeat of this weekend so soon, but if we wait longer... [He shifts suddenly, a little discomforted. It goes beyond just caution now, honestly.

Break will probably be able to guess the crux of Gilbert's problem too, knowing him and his soft heart. It's only week two and Gilbert is already becoming reluctant to do what needs to be done, but at least he's aware of that.]

[ As they move onto more practical matters, it's also easier for Break to slip away from uncomfortable truths that he would still rather not confront. He shifts and relaxes instead of being so visibly tense, because there's nothing to calm you down like talking about murder with your pal. ]

Well... About that. I did have an idea, actually.

[ He cants his head back and forth thoughtfully, but then ends up finishing off his tea. It's quick, even for him, so maybe he's more anxious about the day that he had been letting on. He gestures for Gilbert to pour him another, since that's a little difficult, and he's willing to accept Gilbert's help for small things like this. ]

Only one suspect will be executed, wasn't it? The wording implies two people working together, but it doesn't say that has to be the case. So, what if it were more than one accomplice? My thought was that "if every suspect was an accomplice," that would work out nicely. Getting five people to work together, kill five people, and then the group is playing a game of chance, but the other four would be able to retire. I also had the idea of tying it in with the "true" culprit being someone who had immunity for the week, but I'm not sure just how permissible that part would be.

[ He'll reach to take a sugarcube at this point just to eat as a sweet. ]

Now, we don't know three people that would be willing to agree... But I can think of two that might. Not this week, since I wouldn't propose it before I was sure. But it's a thought.

[Gilbert's human heart feels honestly horrible about considering this...

But he's also had years of practice when it comes to pushing those feelings aside to do some murdering, SO. HERE WE ARE. Break proposing this ridiculous-ass murder scheme and Gilbert genuinely considering it.]

There's a two kill limit per person, but if we had three direct killers and two accomplices... That would be enough for six, wouldn't it? And four of the five of us could still retire. We would just have to be careful, because... regardless, the person who's executed would have a lot riding on their participation.

[Someone who'd agree to kill with them would also probably be willing to throw them under the bus, basically. HE CAN SEE THE FLAWS HERE.]

—Who are the two?

That's the idea. ♥ If we're playing a game of numbers and only one person could be executed, then it won't matter. Even if one piece decides to back out, so long as they participate in the kill, it's irrelevant. Our fellow captives can ultimately only pick one. The only way to ensure a double kill would be a tie, and with our votes, that would be very difficult, wouldn't it?

[ Leave it to Break to come up with not only a plan, but a plan that murders the most people. ]

As for the two, I have a feeling that Morrigan and Rhys would do it. Not for being killers, necessarily, since I don't know either well enough to make that judgement... But I think they would both protect themselves if they were give the opportunity. It's better chance than simply hoping that you aren't killed.

[WELL CONSIDERING HIS SORDID PAST AS A SERIAL KILLER AND ALL...

The plan itself seems pretty solid to Gilbert either way, though, so he doesn't have anything more to say in regard to that. He does look a little surprised by the names given, though...]

Those two? [Morrigan, he could totally see. Rhys... He's a little less sure. He seems like an actual king weenie and not just a "I seem like a king weenie but I also murder people for a living" king weenie.]

I haven't spoken to Morrigan much, but I'm not sure Rhys would participate in something like that.

That's why we can't do it right way.

[ Ironically, considering Break totally has immunity this week... GOD... ]

I'm not completely sure about either, and I wouldn't go forward with such an bold plan until I was certain of it. If they reject the plan from the start, then it'll never work, and we'd be likely to die the next trial for being traitors. But I'm not counting on them to kill, necessarily. We can do that. They only need to agree to be accomplices.

[ Coolly, ] If it's offered as self-preservation to leave the game, well. My gamble here is that they would value their own lives over morals. Combine it with an opportune motive, and we can be all the more certain of it.

[WHAT A WASTE OF IMMUNITY BREAK, GOD!!]

Well... You might not be wrong about that. [The right motive in particular can have a great impact, as they've both learned quite well.]

It's a big risk to take, but it's better than trying to wait out three months and hoping we'll survive just through the luck of the draw. Especially if more deaths like Sisuca's happen... That was a complete wildcard.

[He really doesn't appreciate that it happened at around the same time as his dreams, either?!]

[ He nods ]

That's more or less my thoughts on the matter. Either way... If they refuse, then we'll just continue with the plan regardless. All of our chances are improved with more people, but even with just the two of us, it's not terrible.

[ Break pauses, then laughs gently. ]

I would take a certainty that at least one of us return home over simply watching and waiting, after all.

[It's still awful, having to talk about things in these terms. Awful for them, awful for the others - a no-win situation. The paranoia of last week has faded, and the anxiety from the trial is over, but this guilt and heaviness will cling to him and continue weighing him down. He knows it already. That's how it always is.

But if they don't keep moving forward, they'll just be waiting, and Gilbert has already done so much waiting in his life. It's why he's made those hard decisions in the first place - because he hates waiting and not doing.

(It makes him an awful person in some regards, but he's never claimed to be kind.)]

Right... Right. We'll have to wait and see what their reactions are, then. [It'll be a risk, but still better than nothing.

He lapses into silence after that, quietly considering.]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

this was going to be my death icon but ill take what i can get

uuuUUUUUUUUuuuuuuGHHhhhhh

UGHHH I CANT BELIEVE W2 CURSE LEFT MY ASS BEHIND

YOU'RE NOT DEDAING ON MY WATCH!!!

YOU CANT STOP ME FOREVER

now i'm going to deda next week and gilbert will live the whole game hA

UGH WHACKS YOU WITH A PAINPONG RACKET

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject